(Dis)satisfaction guaranteed???

If there’s one thing in life that you can be really sure of, its running after happiness and satisfaction eternally. How come these bare essentials of life, the things that truly matter, are also the most elusive??

I happened to have a long discussion with a certain friend this evening on a somewhat similar topic. Obviously, when two guys talk on these lines, one of them has to be in a rather disturbed state of mind – and it was him, thankfully, not me. That he later went ahead and made me aware of a hitherto unknown fact – he considers me one of his closest friends – is proof enough of it!! You see, guys have this thing about not indulging in emotional talk (maybe it makes us feel like sissies!!) and don't usually declare all that kinda stuff to each other. Unless boozed up of course, which we were not… siiiggghhhh!! :-(

Anyway, coming back to the point, my new-found best friend and I had a pretty long conversation on this delicate issue. As I went into silent mode, offering my (usually unneeded) opinions and advice only when I deemed it right, he poured out his tale of woes and frustrations. Nothing serious of course, considering that technically he’s an over-achiever, but then I realized that if a person like him can be so dissatisfied in life, what good can a less privileged person expect??

Agreed, we all have our problems, big and small; we all have our achievements too, big and small. And as time passes by, we can be sure that new ones – both problems and achievements – will keep showing up regularly. Then what makes us fail to realize that today’s problems will either be solved tomorrow or cease to be so important or just be forgotten? And that today’s achievements are bound to go through a similar fate too? Why do we all go through life with a mindset that happiness and satisfaction depend on the final result of a constant tug-of-war between our problems and achievements??

The problem of our times, I think, is that we expect too much out of our lives – but even though we aspire for a lot, we want it the easy way and without any sacrifice. In short, we are all driven subconsciously by a self-imposed carrot-&-stick policy (for once, not something that we can blame on our politicians!!), chasing an intangible future at the cost of a much more substantial present.

We fail to find happiness in our achievements, because we are already focusing hard on the next target. And we amplify our failures and problems, to the extent that they blind us from noticing the positives around us, sometimes even preventing us from accepting our mistakes and learning from them. What’s worse, we feel jealous of someone else’s success and happiness, regardless of how many hardships and sacrifices that the person may have gone through, just because we didn’t share a similar fate.

So what is the solution … if there is one??

Not aspire for anything in life, not to harbor any expectations and goals?? No, that would take the spark out of life, stop all growth, stop life itself. Besides, it’s easier said than done anyway!! Leave all problems as they are, wait for ‘destiny’ to take its course?? Not at all, we need to do whatever it takes to solve them, and by all means.

But more importantly, we need to ensure that life isn't reduced to a mere mechanical existence, one that is bogged down by chasing goals and solutions. And for that we need to realize that even though there will always be problems to tackle and goals to achieve, there will also be other co-existent and equally important things that should never be overlooked – like love and loved ones, the closest friends, the small but significant joys and pleasures that otherwise pass by unnoticed, even simple laughter out of day-to-day situations, which does a lot in making life a pleasant trip.

At the end of any bad day, just consider two things:  
What if it were worse? Is it really that important when considering the bigger picture? Coz if one could imagine a day in the future – say six months, a year, two years or even five years down the line – most of today’s problems and achievements alike will fail to seem as important. Even inconsequential in the long run. What will remain though is the realization that all that time lost in frustration, worry and agony could have been used instead to enjoy the better things that were present even then, and which we ignored…

As they say, happiness is a voyage – not a destination...

Enjoy life while it lasts, make the most of it ... coz even though no one can ever know when the end will come, the inevitable final destination is the same for everyone, right?!